What is First Love?

Throughout my life, I've always tried to define one word, love. It's so mysterious to me because love can be felt in so many different ways. When I looked up the definition one that came up was, love is a person or thing one loves. No wonder it confuses me because even love can't be defined without using the word love.

Lately, I've been thinking a lot and I've been wondering who my first love was. If first love is the first person you have strong feelings of affection for, it would be my 4th-grade crush. If first love is the first person who also feels those strong feelings for you, it would be my first boyfriend. If first love is the first person you know you are in love with, it would be my current boyfriend.

I suppose there is no real reason I need to figure out who my first love was. It's just that as I get older and gain more experience, I'm learning more and more about what love is. I feel like some people don't even have to question what love is but I always have.

After thinking about it for a while I settled on an answer that makes sense to me. My first love was my first boyfriend because even though I wasn't in love with him, I did love him. I can't count any of my crushes as love because I don't think unrequited love is the same as requited love. I also can't call my current boyfriend my first love even though he's the first guy I've been in love with because that would be completely ignoring the feelings I had for my first boyfriend and how hard it was more me to get over them. I know it may seem weird that I consider loving someone and being in love with someone as completely different things but, to me, they are. I think first love is kind of open to interpretation but that's how I see it.