I am soon to turn 20 which sounds very adult. A lot of the time I worry that I'm too immature and I don't think seriously enough about my future.
I'm currently a university student studying biology. For the past two years, I assumed I would focus on the cell/molecular side of biology and end up doing lab work. In the last week, after telling my boyfriend about my life decisions that make no sense, I remembered that I dislike microbiology and that it's extremely similar to cell biology. So I've decided to change my focus to ecology and zoology.
The point of this is that I am nowhere near having my life together. I have no idea what I'll be doing in three years when I graduate university. I don't even know what I'll be doing in three months when I'm done with this semester. I decided not to work this summer or take classes because I've been going nonstop since I graduated high school and I'd like to take a break while it's still an option. Part of me wants to do some volunteer work like planting trees or getting rid of invasive plant species or taking care of animals, but another part of me just wants to lie around and go on dates with my boyfriend. I'm well aware that I can do both but I just haven't come to decision yet.
When I look at other people my age I'm kinda in awe because they seem so adult and I seem like a little kid. I wonder how they look so together and polished when I can't even be bothered to put in contacts.
I think it's great that they are doing their best and trying their hardest to live the best life possible but you shouldn't feel bad about yourself if you don't have your life together. The great thing about being in your 20s is that you aren't supposed to have it all figured out. It's the time in your life when you can be selfish and make mistakes. Yes having it all together is ideal but I think it's overrated. Making mistakes, doing stupid things, and messing up will teach you way more about who you are and want you want in life than being perfect ever will.
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