I'm Pathetic

I don't understand it all at... I've spent so much time trying to get over this and rid myself of these feelings. Every time I get so close. So close I feel like I've finally moved on. Then I do something stupid. I start to see you around the halls. I start to see you everywhere I go even when you aren't really there. My mind deludes me and I begin to wonder about you. Wonder if you wonder about me. I can only endure this state for so long before I contact you. We begin to talk and I feel all happy.

I wonder if you ever wanted me to move on at all... If you were absolutely done with me and wanted nothing to do with me, you wouldn't reply so fast. I try to tell myself that you don't like me because you don't text me first but whenever I text you, you reply in seconds. You confuse me you know that? Suggesting things that seem out of place. Why are you so nice to me anyway? You'd think that you'd hold some resentment towards me but you don't. You were always so nice and treated me so well. If you were a jerk than it would have been easy to move on but I have nothing against you. No reasons to tell myself no when I feel like I want to be with you. 

It sucks you know, feeling this way. I feel like I'm such a pathetic hopeless person. But you know if I hated it so much, I would have moved on by now...